epic haiku

weekends

This has been a weekend. Wow. Last year it was the opening weekend of Antigone and the beginning of the end with my ex… or at least the beginning of Dr. Davis’ nagging about how I needed to break up with him. This weekend was significantly better thanks to no false illusions about what I want or need. “Lady, you don’t need a boyfriend, you just need sleep!”- My favorite quote from the Twilight Zone marathon Friday night. It’s just so true. I am of the persuasion that one should not look for a significant other to pass the time, one should occasionally long for their soul mate to appear. This is my paradox: really not wanting a boyfriend, really wanting my soul mate. Weirder still, I am fine with that. Timing is so crucial and so much of last spring semester was spent listening to my then boyfriend wine about his carpet, or his drain, or something disgustingly domestic instead of actually trying to get to know me deeper. As Sabrina said, I don’t fear domestically, I fear being domesticated. I truly enjoyed watching the mush this weekend. It gives me hope for the possibility of that kind of honest caring in my future.

In the mean time, I watched Psycho for my Valentines celebration. I sat between Justin and Jose, who were both sick, didn’t tell me, and now I think I am getting sick… a touching gift. ^_~

We watching Psycho and Notorious back to back and I really thought I would like Notorious better, but I didn’t. Psycho is brilliant on more levels then I can adequately articulate now. I am becoming very happy with my diet of high quality cinema. Friday night I went with a group of Rivendell guys and their raffle dates to see Some Like it Hot at the Barking Legs Theatre. That was a lot of fun. The movie was a little awkward in the fact that Marilyn’s clothes didn’t clothe her, but the hilarity made up for it. It was a touch formulaic, and thus boring at moments, but over all I can recognize why it is on the AFI top twenty list.

I ended the weekend with really bad news. Two of the men at my church back home are in the process of leaving their wives for women they have been having affairs with. I am extremely disgusted at the lack of honor in this situation because, frankly, it scares the shit out of me. It really doesn’t surprise me though, which sad. These men have son’s my age who I did ministries with in high school. These men helped with those ministries. I just praise God that in spite of our fumblings His word does not return void.

Last weekend is also worthy of note as it was heaps of fun. I meant to write about it this week and didn’t. There was karaoke in third lobby (with the wonderful DJ styling of Mark Geib and Lael Garaldi), followed by a somewhat spontaneous trip to Greyfriers were there was much speed scrabble played. Can I just say that it doesn’t get much better then speed scrabble? After that Justin, Jose and I watched Breathless in the Forth Lobby bathroom. *ahem* This was my first experience with Justin and Jose in the Forth Lobby bathroom. I also want to say that I was pressured in to writing that by Linnea, Eb, Earl, Justin and Jose (my Netflix familia).

Thursday Dr. Barker met with my group for poetry. He likes my stuff. This is significant. God is slowly revealing more of his plans for me and I can’t even begin to contemplate how amazing it all is. I just keep praying for the fortitude to stay true to the path he has set before me.

Finally, on a musical note, I have been listening to a lot of Bright Eyes lately. I wanted to share the lyrics to the most played song in my room the last two weeks. It’s written by an idealist like myself who also gets down heartened by the games people play, but dude, still gets horny. This song sort of sums up my reaction to Lost in Translation (which I watched for the first time at Emily’s party. Thanks Emily.) I really liked the movie, but came away from it with this feeling of why get to know people? They just leave. I think about that sometimes, existentialist that I am. Anywho, for what it’s worth, enjoy.

I picked you out
Of a crowd and talked to you.
Said I liked your shoes,
You said, "Thanks, Can I follow you?"

So it's up the stairs,
And out of view. No prying eyes.
I poured some wine.
I asked your name;
You asked the time.

Now it's two o'clock.
The club is closed,
We are up the block.
Your hands are on me,
Pressing hard against your jeans,
Your tongue in my mouth,
Trying to keep the words from coming out,
You didn't care to know
Who else may have been here before.

I want a lover I don't have to love,
I want a girl who is too sad to give a fuck.
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I thought he said to meet him here,
But I'm not sure.
I've got the money
If you've got the time.
He said, "It feels good."
I said "I'll give it a try."

Then my mind went dark,
We both forgot where your car was parked.
Let's just take the train.
I'll meet up with the band in the morning

Bad actors, with bad habits...
Some sad singers, they just play tragic.
And the phone is ringing,
And the van is leaving
Let's just keep touching,
Let's just keep...keep singing

I want a lover I don't have to love,
I want a boy who's so drunk that he doesn't talk.
Where's the kid with the chemicals?
I got a hunger and I can't seem to get full.
I need some meaning I can memorize.
The kind I have always seems to slip my mind.

But you, but you...

You write such pretty words,
But life's no storybook.
Love's an excuse to get hurt.
And to hurt.
Do you like to hurt?
I do, I do.
Then hurt me,
Then hurt me,
Then hurt me...

Posted by Deke at February 16, 2004 01:42 AM